Reading Behavior In Conversation: Part 4

February 2, 2018 in Assessing Individuals

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This is the fourth of a six part exercise to read behavior of both sides of a conversation using an incident where police officers were called to a home where there was the report of a potential break in.

(Video Source)


The Workout

  • Context: In the following video, two police officers talk with a man who was reported being seen outside of a home while carrying a shovel.  In this fourth part, the first officer who spoke with the man is at her patrol car to check on his information, while the second officer is speaking with the man.
  • Because of the length of the video, this exercise will be broken up into a six-part series.
  • Task 1: First, assess the man being contacted’s behavior and identify the observations that support that assessment.
  • Task 2: Second, are there any changes in the man’s behavior when this 4th segment is compared to the first three parts of this exercise?
  • Task 3: Third, assess the police officer’s behavior and identify the observations that support that assessment.  View this from the perspective of the man being contacted.
  • Task 4: Fourth, Identify the cluster of behavior that the police officer likely believes that he is displaying towards the man and identify the observations that support that assessment.
  • Note: We acknowledge that the assessment in task #4 is HIGHLY subjective.  We aren’t in the officer’s head and haven’t talked to him.  We are basing this assessment (when it is different than the behavior observed in Task #3) on the observations and behaviors we can collect in this video.
  • Write your answers on a sheet of paper before viewing our answers

View Our Answers

  • I assess the man as falling into two clusters during the video
  • Task 1: The Man (Initially): The Uncomfortable Cluster
    • Takes a couple of deep breaths
    • Continues to try and get his mom on the phone
    • He leans back in his chair and then immediately comes back forward
    • He crosses his legs and then quickly uncrosses them
    • He is tight lipped with details until he is asked for more information
    • He gets a bit frazzled while trying to pronounce his last name
  • Task 2: Are there any changes in the man’s behavior?
    • Yes
  • The Man (At The End): Begins shifting into The Dominant Cluster
    • In response to getting asked if he has any warrants on file – begins getting annoyed with the questions.  Answers the question abruptly.
    • Says, “I don’t know what the problem is…” in response to the question about an ID and appears to be getting more annoyed that the police are still there despite the fact he has already explained his story.
    • Starts to walk down the stairs so they can go talk to Charlie – trying to get definitive proof that he isn’t a criminal.
    • Illustrating gestures begin to change towards making points explicitly clear
  • Task 3: The Police Officer (As assessed by man): The Dominant Cluster
    • Continues to question the man’s story and tries pin down where he lives
    • Asserts authority: “You can put it on speaker phone.”
    • Asks if he has any warrants on file for him
    • Ue off emblem gestures when he gives the man the “thumbs up” sign when explaining the confusion for the last name.
  • The Police Officer (As likely assessed internally): The Comfortable Cluster
    • It appears that he acknowledges that he believes him.  After the call, the man says, “You do believe me, right?” The officer doesn’t verbalize it, but the man’s response indicates that the officer likely nodded his head or something.
    • Tries the joke again, “People don’t typically break in and then sit on the porch.”
    • When the man tries to go get the neighbor, Charlie, says “No, we straight” – indicating that he doesn’t actually see the guy as a likely criminal.
  • Add a comment with the assessments that you made, but that we didn’t make, so that other viewers can benefit from your analysis as well.

Enhance The Workout

  • Repeat
    • Rewatch the video as many times as is necessary to identify each of the observations that we have identified for the man, the way the officer is likely being perceived by the man, and the way the officer is likely perceiving his own actions.
    • Despite the fact that there is only 10 seconds of interaction, that provides a long enough period of time to build a cluster of at least 3 indicators for each assessment.
    • Being able to quickly establish the initial cluster (the baseline for the man being contacted), is critical so that you can have a point of reference to measure any changes in behavior against.
  • Reflect
    • Are there any times in your life where you have observed a discrepancy between the type of behavior you think you are displaying and the way another person might be perceiving you?
    • This is what is commonly referred to as a miscommunication, where what someone says (whether verbally or nonverbally) is interpreted differently by the person receiving the message than the person communicating it.
    • Think about times where you may have been part of a miscommunication and assess the difference in the cluster of behavior used to express whatever was being talked about.  The goal isn’t to focus on the content of the words conversation itself, but in the way it was expressed.
  • Act
    • As we seek to minimize miscommunications, being able to view a conversation that you are having from a detached perspective is a skill that takes practice.  You are viewing this in a POV way as the footage is from the officer’s body camera, but try to envision seeing this as an outsider.  How is the officer standing? How is he (likely) sizing up the man? How is the man (likely) sizing up the officer?
    • Throughout the week, use some conversations that you are in as an opportunity to practice detaching yourself and viewing the interaction as an outsider, where you can observe yourself through the eyes of another.  It won’t come naturally at first, it absolutely takes work, but is a skill that once developed, can be a huge asset in your ability to assess other people and influence their future actions and behavior.

Related Content:

Reading Behavior In Conversation: Part 3

January 30, 2018 in Assessing Individuals

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This is the third of a six part exercise to read behavior of both sides of a conversation using an incident where police officers were called to a home where there was the report of a potential break in.

(Video Source)


The Workout

  • Context: In the following video, two police officers talk with a man who was reported being seen outside of a home while carrying a shovel.  In this third part, the first officer who spoke with the man is at her patrol car to check on his information, while the second officer is speaking with the man.
  • Because of the length of the video, this exercise will be broken up into a six-part series.
  • Task 1: First, assess the man being contacted’s behavior and identify the observations that support that assessment.
  • Task 2: Second, identify one potential reason for the man’s behavior that indicates a criminal/violent/illegitimate intent and one potential reason for the man’s behavior that is legitimate/not-criminal/non-violent
  • Task 3: Third, assess the police officer’s behavior and identify the observations that support that assessment.  View this from the perspective of the man being contacted.
  • Task 4: Fourth, Identify the cluster of behavior that the police officer likely believes that he is displaying towards the man and identify the observations that support that assessment.
  • Note: We acknowledge that the assessment in task #4 is HIGHLY subjective.  We aren’t in the officer’s head and haven’t talked to him.  We are basing this assessment (when it is different than the behavior observed in Task #3) on the observations and behaviors we can collect in this video.
  • Write your answers on a sheet of paper before viewing our answers

View Our Answers

  • The Man: The Uncomfortable Cluster
    • An increase of illustrating gestures: he recreates everything that he was doing so that the officer can see that he wasn’t breaking into the home.
    • Very quickly rebuts the officer’s assertion that he was breaking into the house (or that neighbors called because it looked like he was).
    • He clarifies partial information given before: “I’m in and out.”
    • He begins identifying all of the people who can vouch for him and prove that he does in fact belong at this house.
    • Attempts to call his mom so that she can tell the officer that he wasn’t breaking in.
  • Potential Reasons For Behavior
    • Criminal/Violent/Illegitimate: Is uncomfortable because he was actually trying to break in and is about to get caught.  Another reason is that he has a criminal history and that the police officer is perceived as a threat because he could catch him.
    • Non-violent/Non-criminal/Legitimate: He is worried that he will be seen as lying and falsely accused or in trouble, even though he hasn’t done anything wrong.  If he does in fact live at that house, the police officers have entered onto his property (his anchor point). His discomfort could also be the result of the officer’s display of dominance because he doesn’t have the ability to establish an ideal separation/distance when assessing the group dynamics.
  • The Police Officer (As assessed by man): The Dominant Cluster
    • Says to the man “you can see what it looks like right?” Showing that while he understands the man, that it does look like he was breaking in.
    • Stops him to get clarity, “Do you actually live here?”
    • Another accusatory question,  “Where’s you key, bro?”
  • The Police Officer (As likely assessed internally): The Comfortable Cluster
    • Allows the man to move around with the shovel, which could be used as a weapon, and something he probably wouldn’t allow if he felt threatened.
    • Allows the man to state his case and to call his mom.
    • He attempts the joke, “well, we usually don’t have some try (to break in) and then just sit on the porch waiting (for the police).”
  • Add a comment with the assessments that you made, but that we didn’t make, so that other viewers can benefit from& your analysis as well.[/expand]

Enhance The Workout

  • Repeat
    • Watch the video as many times as is needed to observe each of the three assessments (the man, the officer as perceived by the man, and the officer’s likely internal assessment), to help build your file folders for the recognition of each cluster.
    • This will help you make these assessments more quickly when you are the one having the conversation and have to consider both what you are observing as well as what you are saying and what you’re hearing. The more repetitions you have make it easier to recognize the displayed behaviors when the situation is more challenging.
  • Reflect
    • Think about the two potential sources of discomfort that you identified in the task.  What information would you need to see in future segments of the video to prove that one or the other is more likely?  List these out if possible.
    • Before considering both possible sources (violent AND non-violent or criminal AND non-criminal) did you find yourself jumping to a conclusion about where this interaction is heading?  That might be a natural reaction, but keep in mind that remaining objective requires that you consider multiple causes for the observed behavior and haven’t shut yourself off to contradictory information.
  • Act
    • In the same as Part 2 of this exercise, throughout the week, use some conversations that you are in as an opportunity to practice detaching yourself and viewing the interaction as an outsider, where you can observe yourself through the eyes of another.
    • It won’t come naturally at first, it absolutely takes work, but is a skill that once developed, can be a huge asset in your ability to assess other people and influence their future actions and behavior.

Related Content:

  • The Full Exercise
    • Part 1
    • Part 2
    • Part 3: THIS EXERCISE
    • Part 4
    • Part 5
    • Part 6
    • Debrief

Reading Behavior In Conversation: Part 2

January 16, 2018 in Assessing Individuals

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This is the second of a six part exercise to read behavior of both sides of a conversation using an incident where police officers were called to a home where there was the report of a potential break in.

(Video Source)


The Workout

  • Context: In the following video, two police officers talk with a man who was reported being seen outside of a home while carrying a shovel.  In this second part, the first officer who spoke with the man has returned to her car to check on his information, while the second officer is approaching the man to talk to him.
  • Because of the length of the video, this exercise will be broken up into a six-part series.
  • Task 1: First, assess the man being contacted’s behavior and identify the observations that support that assessment.
  • Task 2: Second, assess the police officer’s behavior and identify the observations that support that assessment.  View this from the perspective of the man being contacted.
  • Task 3: Third, Identify the cluster of behavior that the police officer likely believes that he is displaying towards the man and identify the observations that support that assessment.
  • Note: We acknowledge that the assessment in task #3 is HIGHLY subjective.  We aren’t in the officer’s head and haven’t talked to him.  We are basing this assessment (when it is different than the behavior observed in Task #2) on the observations and behaviors we can collect in this video.
  • Write your answers on a sheet of paper before viewing our answers

View Our Answers

  • The Man: The Submissive Cluster
    • The man refers to the police officer as “sir.”
    • The man stays seated, making himself look smaller than the officer standing over him
    • The man offers the shovel to the officer and quickly explains that he was doing nothing wrong with the shovel, to show that he is being non-threatening to the officer.
  • The Police Officer (As assessed by man): The Dominant Cluster
    • Opens with an accusatory joke: “What are you doing breaking into your mom’s house?”  While likely intended as a joke, there is the inherent stressor that comes with the accusation of a crime from a police officer.
    • Walks onto the porch: blocking the man’s only exit route or option to re-establish distance from the officer.  Assessed as dominance as it eliminates the opportunity for the man to establish a proxemic separation (group dynamics) that would make him comfortable or not feel threatened.
    • Entry into the man’s anchor point as the porch is part of the home.
    • The question, “what’s with the shovel,” is a direct question, something often seen in the dominant cluster.
  • The Police Officer (As likely assessed internally): The Comfortable Cluster
    • Approaches the man casually and not in an overtly aggressive way.
    • The use of the joke, “What are you doing breaking into your mom’s house?” is said in a light, non-aggressive voice.
    • After going up the stairs to the porch, leans on one arm on the railing (you can see the reflection in the glass door), which is a relaxed posture.
  • Add a comment with the assessments that you made, but that we didn’t make, so that we can check for those assessments and provide feedback on those specific observations.  We will add them to our answers in the post itself for future viewings of the exercise.

Enhance The Workout

  • Repeat
    • Rewatch the video as many times as is necessary to identify each of the observations that we have identified for the man, the way the officer is likely being perceived by the man, and the way the officer is likely perceiving his own actions.
    • Despite the fact that there is only 10 seconds of interaction, that provides a long enough period of time to build a cluster of at least 3 indicators for each assessment.
    • Being able to quickly establish the initial cluster (the baseline for the man being contacted), is critical so that you can have a point of reference to measure any changes in behavior against.
  • Reflect
    • Are there any times in your life where you have observed a discrepancy between the type of behavior you think you are displaying and the way another person might be perceiving you?
    • This is what is commonly referred to as a miscommunication, where what someone says (whether verbally or nonverbally) is interpreted differently by the person receiving the message than the person communicating it.
    • Think about times where you may have been part of a miscommunication and assess the difference in the cluster of behavior used to express whatever was being talked about.  The goal isn’t to focus on the content of the words conversation itself, but in the way it was expressed.
  • Act
    • As we seek to minimize miscommunications, being able to view a conversation that you are having from a detached perspective is a skill that takes practice.  You are viewing this in a POV way as the footage is from the officer’s body camera, but try to envision seeing this as an outsider.  How is the officer standing? How is he (likely) sizing up the man? How is the man (likely) sizing up the officer?
    • Throughout the week, use some conversations that you are in as an opportunity to practice detaching yourself and viewing the interaction as an outsider, where you can observe yourself through the eyes of another.  It won’t come naturally at first, it absolutely takes work, but is a skill that once developed, can be a huge asset in your ability to assess other people and influence their future actions and behavior.

Related Content:

  • The Full Exercise
    • Part 1
    • Part 2: THIS EXERCISE
    • Part 3
    • Part 4
    • Part 5
    • Part 6
    • Debrief

Reading Behavior In Conversation: Part 1

January 10, 2018 in Assessing Individuals

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This is the first of a six part exercise to read behavior of both sides of a conversation using an incident where police officers were called to a home where there was the report of a potential break in.

(Video Source)


The Workout

  • Context: In the following video, two police officers talk with a man who was reported being seen outside of a home while carrying a shovel.  Because of the length of the video, this exercise will be broken up into a six-part series.
  • Task 1: As you watch the video, your task is to observe both the police officer and the man being contacted to determine what cluster of behavior is being displayed by each and identify the observable indicators that support that assessment.
  • Task 2: Would the behavior of the man who is being contacted attract your attention as being an anomaly or would you assess it as being part of the baseline for this type of encounter?
  • Write your answers on a sheet of paper before viewing our answers

View Our Answers

  • The Man: Displaying the Uncomfortable Cluster at a low intensity.
    • Stands up when the officer approaches
    • Explains that he is at his mom’s house and offers his name and his mom’s name
    • A bit of a stutter with his words
    • He shifts his weight back and forth
    • Use of illustrating gestures and explains how he comes here every day
    • Licks his lips
    • Rocks backwards when the officer mentions that someone reported a break in
  • The Police Officer: Displays the comfortable cluster
    • Laughs as she realizes he isn’t breaking in
    • Simply asks if everything is alright
    • Calm tone of voice
    • Is accommodating – says “ok” a lot
  • When considering the man’s behavior:
    • I would, at this point, assess the man’s behavior as being within the baseline.
    • As a uniformed police officer just approached him and mentioned that they are responding to the report of a break-in, that would likely elicit a threat or stress response.
    • It is at a low intensity because the displays indicating discomfort aren’t overly exaggerated.
  • Add a comment with the assessments that you made, but that we didn’t make, so that we can check for those assessments and provide feedback on those specific observations.  We will add them to our answers in the post itself for future viewings of the exercise.

Enhance The Workout

  • Repeat
    • For each of the observations we have listed above (for each person), re-watch the video and observe each of them multiple times so that the observation and the assessment of each one becomes something you pick up on very quickly and rapidly.
  • Reflect
    • Consider how little time you just had (the entire video was only 70 seconds long) to make a first impression about each person.
    • As the video continues in the future exercises, you will have a much greater quantity of information available to you, but the first few seconds of an encounter are what establish a set of expectations that you will have moving forward and to help you recognize shifts in behavior.
    • As shifts in behavior are very important to identify, having a point of comparison for future assessments is a crucial part of a behavioral approach to recognizing threats, and establishing the initial cluster of behavior observed accurately and rapidly is the first step in the process.
  • Act
    • In this exercise, you are viewing a conversation from a removed perspective.  You are hearing it and observing it (through body camera footage), but aren’t taking part in it.
    • One of the milestones as you pursue mastery in a topic is when you can begin to see yourself interacting with others, as if you are another person.
    • That isn’t always a natural thing to do, so throughout the week, when you’re part of a conversation, but not really active in it, take a moment to observe the other two people deeply and think about how someone else would be observing you in that situation.

Related Content:

  • The Full Exercise